TORN

I thought I saw a man brought to life
He was warm, he came around like he was dignified
He showed me what it was to cry
Well you couldnt be that man I adored
You dont seem to know, dont seem to care what your heart is for
But I dont know him anymore
Theres nothing where he used to lie
My conversation has run dry
Thats whats going on, nothings fine Im torn

Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
Im wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
Youre a little late, Im already torn

So I guess the fortune tellers right
Should have seen just what was there and not some holy light
To crawl beneath my veins and now
I dont care, I have no luck, I dont miss it all that much
Theres just so many things that I cant touch, Im torn

Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
Im wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
Youre a little late, Im already torn. torn.

Theres nothing where he used to lie
My inspiration has run dry
Thats whats going on, nothings right, Im torn

Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
Im wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and Im ashamed bound and broken on the floor
Youre a little late, Im already torn

KAHIBANGAN

Bakit kaya ang buhay ganito kung kelan mong gustong kalimutan ang lahat saka naman bumabalik ang nakaraan. Unfair di ba? Masakit !! Sinasabi mong okay ka pero sa kaibuturan naman ng iyong puso hindi eh,nandun pa din ang ala- ala. para kang mabubuwang na patiwari gusto mong takasan ang lahat, bakit ganito?

Nilulunod mo ang iyong sarili sa mga kaibigan online,maski pagbblog ginawa mo na rin. nakamaskara ka nga ba? Di ba nung una okay ka na. wala na yung sakit? Bakit ngayon umaatungal ka pa? okay ka lang?

Makinig ka naman tama na kahibangan mo, makinig ka sa mga kaibigan mo, lumabas ka, mag ayos ka, huwag kang magmukmok , mahalin mo ang sarili mo. Di lang cya ang lalaki sa mundo. He is not your lost, lumabas ka sa comfort zone mo, you are just wasting your time thinking of him! Me napala ka ba sa kakaisip sa knya? Iniisip mo kung okay lang ba siya, pano na ang kanyang business, pano na ang kanyang health, inuubo pa rin ba cya palagi, natutuyuan ng pawis kasi walang aircon, lintik na buhay to!! Natanong mo ba sa sarili mo kung naisip ka rin nya?

Yan isa pa hinahanap mo pa rin ba ang tawag nya, ang text nya? Nasanay ka na kasi sa araw araw na ginawa ng Diyos, walang palya kung siya ay magparamdam. Titigan ang celfon , mahihiga, titignan ang oras, nakaprogram na yan sa sistema mo sa haba ng panahon na ikaw ay nag ilusyon na kayo in the end. Ganito ba talaga kung ikaw ay umiibig?

Teka pag- ibig nga ba talaga to o nadala ka lang sa sitwasyon? Mahirap maipaliwanag , mahiwaga talaga ,walang eksaktong explanation kumbaga lusong ka na lang, mag ingat lang kung hindi ka marunong maglaro talo ka, at least pag natalo nasubukan mo naman,

Teka, teka nakatulong ba to sa pagkatao mo? Me natutunan ka ba o kaya tanga ka lang talaga? Nagbubulag bulagan maski alam na ang katotohan...
Mag isip ka, tama na ang kahibangan mo. Ikaw lang ang makakatulong sa sarili mo!! Maski anong payo ang gagawin sayo kung di ka naman makikinig, wala ding mangyayari ..sarili mo ang kasagutan, wala ng iba pa!! PARA KANG SIRANG PLAKA.. PAULIT ULIT!!

I'LL BE OKAY by AMANDA MARSHALL

It's time to let you go
It's time to say goodbye
There's no more excuses
No more tears to cry
There's been so many changes
I was so confused
All along you were the one
All the time I never knew
I want you to be happy
You're my best friend
But it's so hard to let you go now
All that could have been
I'll always have the memories
She'll always have you
Fate has a way of changing
Just when you don't want it to

Chorus

Throw away the chains
Let love fly away
Till love comes again
I'll be okay
Life passes so quickly
You gotta take the time
Or you'll miss what really matters
You'll miss all the signs
I've spent my life searching
For what was always there
Sometimes it will be too late
Sometimes it won't be fair
Chorus
Throw away the chains
Let love fly away
Till love comes again
I'll be okay
I won't give up
I won't give in
I can't recreate what just might have been
I know that my heart will find love again
Now is the time to begin

Chorus

Throw away the chains
Let love fly away
Till love comes again
I'll be okay
I'll be okay
I'll be okay
I can't hold on forever baby
I can't hold on forever baby
I can't hold on forever baby
I'll be okay

UNTITLED

I am used to write a poem for others, and I want to do the same with you now,
I am thinking what to write as I tick every ink of this pen, I wonder why I can’t
I need an answer to this question; I am organizing my thoughts, thinking beautiful words that best suit you…

My mind won’t cooperate but my heart’s says go on… come on…. You can make a good one!!!
As I am lying on my bed now, I got a pen and write…Words perfectly flow in my mind BUT the POEM I WANT TO WRITE CANNOT BE PUT INTO WORDS….

I wonder why…. I can’t find no answer…
Until I realize that the answer is not with this pen and paper…….
‘COZ THE POEM ITSELF IS YOU!!

october 23, 2007
7:34 am
after teaching

WHY ME ... YOU CAN NEVER ESCAPE THE PAIN

There are times you think everything is ok, you think pain is no longer there
you laugh as if nothing had happened… you want to escape

pretend that you are in control where in fact you are not.

You tire your mind and self just to forget….. but at the end of the day it’s still a torture
You can’t no longer picture his face, you can’t no longer think of the happy moments with him, you can’t no longer think he exists and became part of your life but deep in your soul he exists and the pain lingers… and as if you want to tell him … WHY ME?

You can’t blame him for he’s been good and you learned a lot from him but why love can cost too much emotions which makes you think the world is so cruel where in fact you’ve been good …you sacrificed and became selfless because of him …..and ask yourself again WHY ME?

Love is in deed a gamble, if you are not ready to be hurt don’t indulge yourself …. If you are ready to fall in love then you welcome yourself in the world between sane and insanity…. You laugh hard, burst into tears, do everything in the name of love and sometimes you forget that you have your own life to live…to forgive is to forget but let yourself go through the stages of hurting coz YOU CAN NEVER ESCAPE THE PAIN..